Mindfulness is simply learning to take a step back from your thoughts. Focusing “out” when your mind wants to focus in and be victimized by your own thinking. It’s not about being an intellectual, critical thinker. It’s the opposite of that.
[TRANSCRIPT]:
You may have heard the phrase, “Don’t believe everything you hear,” but what you probably haven’t heard before is this also includes your own thoughts. Don’t believe everything that’s going on inside your head. This is what gets us in trouble.
The problem is, those thoughts have been there so long, that it’s kind of like a dog barking across the street all day. Eventually, you stop hearing it. Then somebody comes over to your house and says, “Man! That dog is barking like crazy!” and you’re like, “What dog?” “What are you talking…Oh, yeah! THAT dog…” THAT is mindfulness.
The Narrator in Your Head
This is how our thoughts are. This is how the narrator in our head is, and so it’s really important to be able to step back, and to tune into those thoughts,
but it can be hard to do.
The absolute best thing you can do when you’re working with a coach, is to tune into that dog–to tune into that narrator that is in your head all day long that is probably not saying very nice things.
“You are either the observer or the victim of your own thoughts.”
Once You Tune In to Being Mindful…
I can remember one of my clients about a decade ago: we’d had a few sessions and she wasn’t quite able to tune into that narrator in her head, until one day I called her, and she yelled,
“I heard it!”
And I said, “Whoa! Heard what? What are we talking about?”
She said “I heard the narrator in my head. I heard that barking dog!”
I said, “Well, great! What did it say?”
And she said, “I was walking in the park, and I see this guy reading a newspaper…and I hear my thoughts say, ‘he probably thinks I’m a horrible person‘…. wait, first of all, he doesn’t even know me… Why does that even matter!? And then when I really started paying attention, I have these kinds of thoughts all the time! There’s this narrator saying all these horrible things! No wonder I’m not feeling good about my life…and where I’m at.”
So then, with her new awareness, and her ability to tune into these thoughts, in our coaching sessions, we had all of this great raw material to work with. We had all of this new stuff to really dig into.
Becoming the Observer is Key to Mindfulness
So becoming the observer of your thoughts is probably one of the single most important things you can do for any type of personal development; to tune into that barking dog, to what that narrator is saying. This is absolutely key for any type of advancement in life that you want. Be more mindful.
You are either the victim or the observer of your thoughts. So learn to be the observer; Learn to be the observer, and to tune in to those things and what your mind is saying— Grab some popcorn — it can be quite entertaining! Once you’re able to do it, you’ll see your life getting much much better.
p.s. – Do you want to learn how to stop being a victim to your thoughts? Book a FREE trial session directly in my calendar and learn how to detach from negative thinking.
Paul Strobl, MBA, CPC
Owner of Confide Coaching, LLC
Paul is a Master Life Coach for GenX and GenY executives and business owners. Originally from Houston, Texas, he has been location independent for most of his adult life. He currently resides in the Rhodope Mountains of Bulgaria near the Greek border with his brilliant wife, 13-year-old stepson (officially adopted in 2021!) and a Posavac Hound rescue.
